Child and adolescent-to-parent violence and abuse: CAPVA


Child and adolescent-to-parent violence and abuse (CAPVA) is a frequently hidden and complex issue which often arises in families caring for an individual with FASD. It continues to be misunderstood and minimised outside of the family home. 

New Zealand research (Gibbs, 2024) found that 57% of families in the FASD community are experiencing or have experienced violence from their child – and if you are in this group, you are not alone.

If you are experiencing CAPVA please be assured that it is not due to poor parenting – it can be because the young person in your care is struggling to regulate and/or make sense of their emotions. This can result in a need to dominate, coerce, and gain control over their parents/caregivers. 

Displays of aggression and violence by children/adolescents towards adults that are intended to threaten and intimidate and put family safety at risk can include: 

  • Making threats 
  • Exhibiting uncontrolled rage (this is dysregulated behaviour where there is a risk of harm to others) 
  • Verbal abuse -yelling, screaming swearing, name calling, making intimidating comments  
  • Physical - hitting, kicking, punching, biting, throwing objects or using objects as a weapon to intimidate or harm, breaking family property, hurting pets, pushing, blocking. 
  • Playing mind games – manipulating, controlling, gaslighting, threatening to run away, self-harming, confabulating. 
  • Sexual – touching, exposing themselves, sexual innuendos.  
  • Financial – stealing, using credit cards, coercing money from caregivers. 

People experiencing CAPVA report that they are always in a state of hyper-vigilance and feel like they are walking on eggshells waiting for the next explosion. Some of the common mental health effects of family violence are PTSD, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, suicidal thoughts, hopelessness and fear of the future. 

Support groups for people living with CAPVA can be extremely helpful – to be with others who understand you and can support you through these moments can be literally life-saving.

Luckily help is at hand in the form of new agency VisAble in Aotearoa which has created a caregiver, parent, grandparent and whānau support group, alongside a range of resources for both caregivers and the professionals who support them. See tab below for more info.